You can rock it, you can roll it,
You can lock the rock and put your feet up.
You can sit right back and really enjoy
Your genuine la-z-boy.
I do realse some people reading this may not be old enough (or didn't grow up in NZ during 1980's) to appreciate the above lyrics, but this pretty much summarised my Tuesday visit to the oncology day unit. I should add that I've had some technical difficulties with this blog, so its going to be picture-less and after having to retype it, it will be rather shorter than planned.
Anyway... so back to sitting in a lazy boy.... no remote control though, but instead being covered with a mini electric blanket on my arm (all will be revealied laer), and attatched to a i.v line.
welcome to my "every 3rd Tuesday".
So as a quick update, here's where I am at with Chemo... on the 17th I started what I'm going to refer to as my "insurance policy" chemo. The aim of this is chemo treatment is to basically kill any possible random cancer cells that may be left in my body (as stated before Chemo kills fast growing cells, which cancer is one type).
this time Chemo will last for 4.5 months and will consist of "rounds" which entail a 21 day cycle. On day 1, I'll receive an IV chemo drug called Oxaliplatin. This is administered through a vein in my arm and involves me sitting in a chair (funny enough a La-Z-Boy chair) for a few hours whilst that and a mixture of glucose (yep sugar) is pumped into me (apparently it flows better with glucose... doesn't everything flow better with sugar!). This drug has some unusual side effects (the biggest one is that I become highly sensitive to cold for a few days (- bring in the electric arm blanket), particularly touching and eating / drinking cold stuff, thankfully this only last for about 4-5 days after the iv infusion). The Oxaliplatin, so I've discovered also makes me sick.... picture (well try not too) really sick... if it was possible I would have thrown up my eyeball on Tuesday night... on a bonus, this only lasts a day and I have some great meds to help stop it.
Anyway..... also on day one of the cycle I start taking an oral chemo drug called capecitebine (this is the same drug I had last time, but in a stringer dose this time). I take this for 14 days and then have a week drug free, before restarting the round/ cycle again with "day one".
The good news is that I'm now on day 8 and I'm feeling great! bring on a week of no drugs... I bet I'll feel amazing!!!!
welcome to my world for the next 4 and a half months!.
Right, so that's my latest updates, other than having met with my surgeon on Monday this week..... that's me. FYI apt went well.... I'm now medically cleared to restart rehabbing my sliced and diced body..... so watch this space.
so until next time...
take care
RAG
Wednesday 25 February 2015
Saturday 14 February 2015
Choice Bro
Choices.... something we generally take for granted...
everyday we are faced with an infinite amount of choices.... red undies or green ones? tea or coffee? dress or pants? ipod or radio? matching socks or "shit, I'll just wear what I can find, and hope for the best"?
Todays topic is brought to you by the letter C.... C is for Choices, Cancer, Chemo and Chocolate four things that I know a lot about. For reference my favourite is chocolate!
Right .....back to the reason for this post.
I think I have posted before about control (ohhh another C word), and how cancer takes pretty much all control away from you, well this post follows on from that.
Choices.....
how many times in a day have you actually consciously thought about some of the most simplistic choices you can make? we generally go through our days not acknowledging how many choices we can actually freely make.... we choose the brand of cereal or bread we eat around such things as price, taste and flavour. Clothes are chosen based on several factors (what's clean, what's suitable for work, what makes your boobs look bigger or bum smaller), your choice of music in the car is based around many factors such as your mood, who's in the car with you, and how far your driving. These are all choices we make in the blink of an eye, we may think about them but often we take them for granted.
Now I realise this currently makes it look like I constantly analyse every small minute aspect of my life, trust me I don't, but recently its got me thinking....
Cancer changes your ability to freely make choices.... so you start valuing what choices you can actually make freely and mindfully.
Pre cancer I doubt I would have battered an eyelid about some of the somewhat mundane choices I would have made on a daily basis. Now I'm valuing what I can have choices in.... small things can make my day, it gives me some control back and I feel less like I'm being held captive by some invisible field.
Some choices I do get to make are based around long term goals, they may not be what others would choose, but for me I am choosing to plan ahead.... such as choosing to start what is called my "insurance" chemo. While I'm technically cancer free, I need to do another treatment schedule of chemo to make sure that any possible cells that may be lurking are killed off so they don't decided to make themselves comfortable in a few years time.
I'm choosing not to feel bad about my situation, its not the best and I have a feeling that the next 4.5-6 months are going to be hard, but I am choosing to focus on the fact I'm giving myself and my family life.
I will be making the most of the choices I can make... there are a lot of things I don't have a choice about, but I'm not going to dwell on that..... the big picture is the prize at the end and that is my focus.
So next time your needing to make a choice, big or small, savour it, and enjoy it... there are some people out there that are not able to freely make the choices they want, and whilst their choices may not actually be what you would choose, remember their choices may be the only viable option for them.
now back to the 4th C.... chocolate.... mmmmmm we are good friends... there is really actually no choice here.... just eat it and enjoy :-)
everyday we are faced with an infinite amount of choices.... red undies or green ones? tea or coffee? dress or pants? ipod or radio? matching socks or "shit, I'll just wear what I can find, and hope for the best"?
Todays topic is brought to you by the letter C.... C is for Choices, Cancer, Chemo and Chocolate four things that I know a lot about. For reference my favourite is chocolate!
Right .....back to the reason for this post.
I think I have posted before about control (ohhh another C word), and how cancer takes pretty much all control away from you, well this post follows on from that.
Choices.....
how many times in a day have you actually consciously thought about some of the most simplistic choices you can make? we generally go through our days not acknowledging how many choices we can actually freely make.... we choose the brand of cereal or bread we eat around such things as price, taste and flavour. Clothes are chosen based on several factors (what's clean, what's suitable for work, what makes your boobs look bigger or bum smaller), your choice of music in the car is based around many factors such as your mood, who's in the car with you, and how far your driving. These are all choices we make in the blink of an eye, we may think about them but often we take them for granted.
Now I realise this currently makes it look like I constantly analyse every small minute aspect of my life, trust me I don't, but recently its got me thinking....
Cancer changes your ability to freely make choices.... so you start valuing what choices you can actually make freely and mindfully.
Pre cancer I doubt I would have battered an eyelid about some of the somewhat mundane choices I would have made on a daily basis. Now I'm valuing what I can have choices in.... small things can make my day, it gives me some control back and I feel less like I'm being held captive by some invisible field.
Some choices I do get to make are based around long term goals, they may not be what others would choose, but for me I am choosing to plan ahead.... such as choosing to start what is called my "insurance" chemo. While I'm technically cancer free, I need to do another treatment schedule of chemo to make sure that any possible cells that may be lurking are killed off so they don't decided to make themselves comfortable in a few years time.
I'm choosing not to feel bad about my situation, its not the best and I have a feeling that the next 4.5-6 months are going to be hard, but I am choosing to focus on the fact I'm giving myself and my family life.
I will be making the most of the choices I can make... there are a lot of things I don't have a choice about, but I'm not going to dwell on that..... the big picture is the prize at the end and that is my focus.
So next time your needing to make a choice, big or small, savour it, and enjoy it... there are some people out there that are not able to freely make the choices they want, and whilst their choices may not actually be what you would choose, remember their choices may be the only viable option for them.
now back to the 4th C.... chocolate.... mmmmmm we are good friends... there is really actually no choice here.... just eat it and enjoy :-)
from one of my favourite movies......
Until next time RAG x x x
Sunday 1 February 2015
There is no place like home
Home sweet home... the place you can be yourself, leave your shoes in the middle of the floor and wear your most comfortable clothes without worrying what anyone will say.
I am now home.... I was finally discharged on Monday. Getting home was a massive high... this time my hospital stay involved living in a 4 bed room... you know your surgery is on the more low key side when you don't get your own room. Overall my "roomies" were pretty good. It is a bit funny when the nursing staff start calling you Radioactive girl or come and visit you when they hear your on the ward again (picture 11.30 pm visit and catch up by one of my favourite nurses from last time who was on the night shift and heard I was awake).
This part of my journey started on Wednesday the 21st, when I "reported" to the hospital.. they really do make it sound like your checking into a hotel.. report at reception..... on hindsight I should have requested a room with an ocean view and a king bed!
Since this was the big "good bye" to Judith, I decided to do this in a bit of style... I left a note for my surgeon (he's getting use to my badly timed sense of humour and long lists of questions).
Skip forward a couple of hours and I officially wake up in recovery - a Dyson (bagless).
Now the next few days (photos still to come as there seems to be a technical issue happening) involved acquainting myself with my roomies, being reunited with my old pole dancing friend "Baxter"... this time he was supporting both IV fluids and Morphine, drinking large quantities of fluids and discovering that there is a point where you actually can eat far too much jelly (try getting it served, along with a lemonade popsicle for every meal for 3 days straight!)... now the other thing that needed to occur was my body to decide to remember how to use the now fully plumbed large intestine... this actually takes time, and until then I was on the fluids only diet...
The human body is a pretty cool thing, it can do a whole heap of stuff... like start working in a functional manner after being sliced open, replumbed, parts left dormant, then resliced open and replumbed yet again, and then start to remember how to work all over again. Now for some people it takes a little longer to start working again normally (and there are some horror stories out there about this), thankfully my body has decided to work in a way that I'm pretty happy about.
So fast forward to now.... I'm now 1 week and 4 days post surgery. Things are working pretty well (better than I could have imagined to be honest), I'm still on painkillers and I still have part of my wound to pack (this is where the drain came out)... but I'm doing well. Time now to get better, heal fast and get myself ready for my next 'adventure' - Chemo.
Like everything that I've done and been through so far, I have learnt things along this part of my journey.....
1. the nutritional content and taste of hospital food leaves a lot to the imagination
2. that no matter how bad you think things are going for you, there is always someone out there having a worse time (sharing a room with a beautiful lady with terminal/ end stage cancer makes you appreciate what you have).
3. I'm still amazed as to how awesome a group of friends and family I have.... visits, txt, FB messages, phone calls etc... no matter what I know I am not alone.
4. some farts are not just farts
5. that some people really do need a good punch in the face (picture: 2 days of nil by mouth/ limited fluids other than a drip and ice water, a woman gets admitted to the bed opposite, starts complaining she's hungry, eats a full hospital meal in front of you, then calls her friend to bring McDonalds up to her.... proceeds to eat said meal - thankfully curtains pulled, but making running commentary about the meal. NB whilst McDonalds is certainly not the food I would choose to enjoy after a 'fast" the smell of chips and burgers is actually something rather magical after 2 days of fluids only... PS Punching people is wrong... what I should have said is that I wished her pubes would be infested by the fleas of a 1000 camels).
6. giving your beloved other half the opportunity to learn to dress your wound and pack it (saves daily community nurse visits and trips to the hospital), creates a rather happy camper (hmmmm someone was a little too happy to do this!.... there are a lot of in-house jokes about a scene from the movie Ted when this is being done).
Home is good.... I think I have chalked up enough hospital time lately... so I'm not planning on heading back any time soon.
RAG x
I am now home.... I was finally discharged on Monday. Getting home was a massive high... this time my hospital stay involved living in a 4 bed room... you know your surgery is on the more low key side when you don't get your own room. Overall my "roomies" were pretty good. It is a bit funny when the nursing staff start calling you Radioactive girl or come and visit you when they hear your on the ward again (picture 11.30 pm visit and catch up by one of my favourite nurses from last time who was on the night shift and heard I was awake).
This part of my journey started on Wednesday the 21st, when I "reported" to the hospital.. they really do make it sound like your checking into a hotel.. report at reception..... on hindsight I should have requested a room with an ocean view and a king bed!
Since this was the big "good bye" to Judith, I decided to do this in a bit of style... I left a note for my surgeon (he's getting use to my badly timed sense of humour and long lists of questions).
Skip forward a couple of hours and I officially wake up in recovery - a Dyson (bagless).
Now the next few days (photos still to come as there seems to be a technical issue happening) involved acquainting myself with my roomies, being reunited with my old pole dancing friend "Baxter"... this time he was supporting both IV fluids and Morphine, drinking large quantities of fluids and discovering that there is a point where you actually can eat far too much jelly (try getting it served, along with a lemonade popsicle for every meal for 3 days straight!)... now the other thing that needed to occur was my body to decide to remember how to use the now fully plumbed large intestine... this actually takes time, and until then I was on the fluids only diet...
The human body is a pretty cool thing, it can do a whole heap of stuff... like start working in a functional manner after being sliced open, replumbed, parts left dormant, then resliced open and replumbed yet again, and then start to remember how to work all over again. Now for some people it takes a little longer to start working again normally (and there are some horror stories out there about this), thankfully my body has decided to work in a way that I'm pretty happy about.
So fast forward to now.... I'm now 1 week and 4 days post surgery. Things are working pretty well (better than I could have imagined to be honest), I'm still on painkillers and I still have part of my wound to pack (this is where the drain came out)... but I'm doing well. Time now to get better, heal fast and get myself ready for my next 'adventure' - Chemo.
Like everything that I've done and been through so far, I have learnt things along this part of my journey.....
1. the nutritional content and taste of hospital food leaves a lot to the imagination
2. that no matter how bad you think things are going for you, there is always someone out there having a worse time (sharing a room with a beautiful lady with terminal/ end stage cancer makes you appreciate what you have).
3. I'm still amazed as to how awesome a group of friends and family I have.... visits, txt, FB messages, phone calls etc... no matter what I know I am not alone.
4. some farts are not just farts
5. that some people really do need a good punch in the face (picture: 2 days of nil by mouth/ limited fluids other than a drip and ice water, a woman gets admitted to the bed opposite, starts complaining she's hungry, eats a full hospital meal in front of you, then calls her friend to bring McDonalds up to her.... proceeds to eat said meal - thankfully curtains pulled, but making running commentary about the meal. NB whilst McDonalds is certainly not the food I would choose to enjoy after a 'fast" the smell of chips and burgers is actually something rather magical after 2 days of fluids only... PS Punching people is wrong... what I should have said is that I wished her pubes would be infested by the fleas of a 1000 camels).
6. giving your beloved other half the opportunity to learn to dress your wound and pack it (saves daily community nurse visits and trips to the hospital), creates a rather happy camper (hmmmm someone was a little too happy to do this!.... there are a lot of in-house jokes about a scene from the movie Ted when this is being done).
Home is good.... I think I have chalked up enough hospital time lately... so I'm not planning on heading back any time soon.
RAG x
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